Welcome to Tea Time with Charli, where we talk about all things involving etiquette.
Growing up with my great-grandmother, I was constantly reminded of the importance of having good manners and following proper etiquette (acting like I have sense). I must admit when she would lecture me, my only focus was, “Where are we going to have this good time, and what am I going to wear?”
Now that I am older and wiser, I realize the importance etiquette plays in setting the standard for us to treat others with respect, value, and consideration. Etiquette ensures that we know how to conduct ourselves in any environment and can assist in building self-confidence. Tea Time with Charli looks forward to sharing traditional and not-so-traditional etiquette rules with you.
With Summer being just around the corner, there will be invites sent out for weddings and other special events– so let’s talk about the R.S.V.P.
R.S.V.P. – Why is it important?
For starters, did you know R.S.V.P is a verb? That’s right; it is an action word derived from the French phrase “Respondez S’il Vous Plait,” meaning respond, please! When you receive an R.S.V.P, you must take action.
Yes Responses
If you know the instant you receive the invite that you are going, please respond immediately. Do not wait until the deadline to respond. Also, if there are plus one or no children rules, do not ask your host to make an exception.
No Responses
To my surprise, there are quite a few people who believe you do not have to reply to an R.S.V.P. if you are not attending the event. This is not true. You should always respond as soon as you know that you are not able to go.
- Do not sit on the invitation until the last minute.
- Do not start avoiding the hosts attempts to follow up with you– no disappearing acts please.
Your failure to respond affects the catering decisions, rentals, party favors, seating charts, and location– especially for formal events such as weddings and sweet sixteens. Deadlines are crucial to the success of these events. When you fail to respond, your host is left with a false sense-of-hope that you may show up– and/or they possibly will lose hundreds of dollars for a dinner you don’t show up to eat.
If you feel you need to give an explanation for declining the invite, keep it clean and simple.
- Thank you for the invite. I’m sorry, I can’t make it.
- I’m sorry; I really wish I could be there
- I am so happy for you. Wish I could be there.
- We don’t want to rain on our host’s parade.
Digital Invites
When responding to digital invites, the same rules apply, respond as soon as your decision is made. Unlike paper invites, a host can see that you have received the invite and have not responded.
Don’t be tacky– R.S.V.P!
