I am Rahab…Bent but Not Broken

By Charlie

I am going to say it out loud; I am bent but not broken! When I verbalize it or write it, I have to acknowledge my growth, failures, fears, imperfections, and disappointments, including moments of shock and epiphany. Heck, 2020 was full of all of these moments, a real doozy.

Nothing made me realize how blessed I was more than to live through Covid-19, to not lose any family members to it, all while being blessed enough not to get laid off and still see my family want for nothing. A pandemic can quickly gather you together and make you realize that the extra 10 pounds you wanted to lose and that promotion you didn’t get and griping over are all irrelevant in the grand scheme of things. Like my aunt, Sandra ministered to me, “don’t be alarmed; we are just simply living in a pause.”

While living in this pause, despite being bent over President Trump’s methods and logic, the racial divide, all the black lives lost due to police brutality…and of course, Covid, I realized I couldn’t continue to operate in fear or panic; my family still needed me. If I could help someone along the way, I would make the extra effort. I pulled myself out of my bed regardless of the overwhelming feelings that came with losing friends and the twilight zone experience. Yes, I was scared, and I felt hopeless. I even began to question if all I’d done in my life was in vain or what could I have done differently (especially if this was it). But I dug deep and remembered Jeremiah 29:11

“For I know the thoughts I have toward you, saith the Lord, thoughts to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

And I declare it…because I am Rahab, too.